Friday, August 31, 2018

The Theory of Accepting Change (and People)!

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My heart is a nomad and I can be home anywhere and everywhere as I love change, embrace it and learn to adapt. I have traveled and stayed in different regions. Loved people, their languages, their culture and made friends from all the places I have stayed. Let me tell you a secret I have discovered in due course of my adventurous journey, accepting change wholeheartedly brings peace and happiness.

Hold my hand, and in some short passages I'll explain to you why we are so full of unrest and I'll show you the way to attain loving and lasting joy.

We all are made up of cells but yet we are so different from each other. Our appearances, history, culture, genes, climate, language, beliefs make us as different from each other as can be. Even identical twins start showing differences in some time. And incredible it may sound; the truth is we are scared of our differences. We are so taken by, obsessed by our own identities that we are afraid to accept anything that challenges us as if the difference of other people would swallow us. To avoid such conflicts within us we try to impose our culture on others. We are our own favorite and want to be favorites of others as well. We want others to accept our way to be the best way. The idea of conversion is not only limited to faith and religion alone. It encompasses and surpasses language, lifestyles, even meals (ever heard this: You are a Vegetarian! How do you survive!!!). Look around yourself, people are busy telling about themselves with vanity. My way of eating, my way of living, my way of worshiping, my language, my culture. We are quick to reject others and their standards. Either hating it or being jealous of it to the extent of hating it. 

Tired of my rants? I don't blame you. I tell you why!

I am a compulsive listener. By compulsive, I mean I am unable to break a one-sided conversation. This often leads me to situations where I end up reluctantly listening to even bull****. Don't worry I am working on this. But that's not the point here. Everything has some positive side. And the positive of my being a compulsive listener is that I have realized why people tend to become so rigid with the passage of time. Why we tend to cling to our culture so much that we stop learning and exploring! As I absorbed more of bull**** and cursed myself for being so helpless in front of insensitive one-sided talkers, I had a eureka moment!

We stop being flexible because somewhere we are scared of change. Somewhere we are comfortable being lazy-bums in our comfort zones. Maybe it’s a natural instinct. We are designed to act alert and run for cover in case of any unusual happening. But like everything, even this design can prove fatal if we start applying it excessively and exhaustively. 

Confused? Let me explain by an example.

‘A’ stays in a far-off location than ‘B’. Both A and B are going through their respective cultural and civilization developments as per their means and necessities. But both A and B feel alone in a big wide world and struggle to remain happy in their respective mundane life. They feel directionless, hopeless, purposeless. Unbeknownst to them, together they can be of immense help to each other if they happen to mutually exchange their share of knowledge. And it so happens by the design of the Universe that both crosses each other paths. Yet, after initial introductions, instead of learning they start a silent competition about whose culture is better, whose language should be superior, whose beliefs are truer. Because somewhere both are scared. Petrified to leave their comfort zones and accept the adventures that come along with exploring each other’s background and ways of living! What if their own identity would get lost, what if their history gets washed away, what if the stories of their tribulations and victories become insignificant like a grain in the vast ocean of sand? The selfish and egoist thoughts take over everything else.

Well, so let’s assume the worst happens - that everything does gets lost - history, culture, identity. So what? What's the big deal if everything gets lost in finding answers to all your doubts?
If everything does get lost but leaves a lasting peace and happiness, then isn't that worth it? 
If all of my religion, your religion, my God, your God, my belief, your belief, my language, your language, my culture, your culture, my loneliness, your loneliness  - does get lost giving way to love among us, acceptance among us, warmth among us than isn't that lost worth it? 

If yes, if you believe it is worth it then move your bums, get up and leave your comfort zones, your beliefs, your culture, your ego; stop looking at the differences and accept everyone as they are with a smile. And then you will realize that nothing actually gets lost in accepting change but together we can discover our true selves to mutually flourish and prosper.

I have traveled and stayed in different regions. Loved people, their languages, their culture and made friends from all the places I have stayed. I am still learning, giving, imbibing, exploring different cultures and one thing that has stayed with me is one belongs to nowhere and yet one belongs to everywhere. Just believe in the goodness of hearts starting from your very own :)

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