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Monday, December 19, 2016

Normal vs C-sec - what is meant to be.

I know reading the title most of you will assume that I am gonna discuss about the pros n cons of the two kinds of delivery methods - Normal and C-sec. Well, you will find plenty of articles and discussions on this. Moreover, I have the experience of only C-sec delivery, having been operated both times for my both babies. So, what I am gonna tell you here is different.
pic courtesy here
I have always been a fan of natural healing and following nature's path. Whether it is about listening to my stomach while eating or listening to my body when I fall sick, I try not to interfere much in nature's discourse. So I knew even if it is difficult, I have to deliver natural way. For if woman is blessed to nurture life within her body, then she has enough strength to push it out in the world. Hence, for my first baby I researched and consulted the best doctor who is famous to handle natural deliveries in my city. My pregnancy was normal, hardly any issue throughout. I was very happy with my doc too. A very happy lady who would not scare me at all. She helped my friend deliver her baby normally without any issue. All looked good to go until the ninth month. Two visits before the final D-day and my weight shot up mysteriously. Doc looked at me with wide eyes. What did you do?, she asked. Get these scans and tests done now. She feared I had developed gestational Diabetes in the last month. The results were out and nothing such was there. The scan was 3D so my baby picture was very clear. Just like my husband it looked. "Chubby chubby baby", said doc animatedly as she rolled her eyes. There were still few weeks to go and she feared that the baby would be too heavy for a timid me to deliver normally. Then she threw another bomb, she was going on vacation to have a much needed break. Famous and busy Doc, she clearly looked exhausted as I showed her my inhibitions consulting the other doc, her colleague she referred me to. I had no option. Next week, the other doc confirmed normal delivery is next to impossible. Not satisfied I consulted another doctor at the last minute and she also gave me the same verdict based on another development at that moment. Still we can give one try, she agreed as she saw me uncomfortable with the thought of being operated. Oh, I waited whole night as I was induced multiple times but nothing happened. Not even the slightest of pain. Baby was happily moving inside, in no mood to come out though the due date had passed days ago. Mentally tired, I gave up!

The last minute action and change in hormones after the birth of my daughter made me very doubtful and full of questions. I would often think if I was another goat to be butchered in the health industry that prefers C-sec to normal delivery because of the monetary profits it offers? For, I was hearing all those horrors stories about greedy doctors in big cities lying and cheating to patients. The prejudiced opinions about girls who don't want to feel the pain of labor and go for elective made me even more repentant. Could it have been a normal delivery in my small hometown, I would often wonder that. The thoughts would be stronger if I heard a normal delivery story of another women. I would rethink the whole climax and try to figure out where I could have been "strong". 3 years and slowly I realized, I am not alone. Many women who get surprises during their delivery at eleventh hour feel that way. They are mostly the ones who would pop up the question "Your kid? Normal delivery?". Somewhere, we all are looking for a company always. After all normal is natural and hence, sign of strength, was the belief.

Meanwhile, my girl was growing up. Along with her, my horizon too widening. Soon it was time for me to plan the second baby. By this time I was very clear, I wanted to go for C-sec. Yes, I had made up my mind except that I gave nature its due chance if it wanted to interfere. The Doc who operated on me last time supported me to wait for a specific period. Just like last time, nothing happened and I happily asked her to start the procedure. I was calm, composed and planned everything keeping in mind my toddler. The delivery was a happy experience unlike the last time.

This is my story. So, what changed my mind? What made a person like me who prefers natural ways embrace the human skills? As always the belief in spirituality helped. "What is meant to happen, is bound to happen, no matter what. And there is nothing good or bad about what happens. Acceptance is one of the only choices". The exercise of rewinding the circumstances and my actions, somewhere made me sure that I tried my best within my power and knowledge for a normal delivery, still it was a C-sec as it was meant that way.

 I choose to see my first born as a happy soul who was blessed with a painless birth. 

Was I a sacrificial goat, then? May be, but it didn't matter. For if I was, it was meant to be. :) The past I took care of, thus.

Coming to the strength of a woman part. Am I less strong because I got scared? Well, mountain dew (not sponsored) has the answer. "Darr sabhi ko lagta hai, paseena sabhi ka nikalta hai" :) There have been and will be umpteen incidences where I have been strong and where I am and will be strong. Living life itself is a sign of strength. To whom I want to prove my mettle? Cheer up. you ladies and yes, you men. You all are strong for all the choices you make in life as long as your intentions are clear.

And why I selected elective C wholeheartedly for my second time? There are views that medical procedures are anti-God. I am a believer in superpower. I am also a believer of science. "What happens is meant to be". All these discoveries, these cure, these procedures were and are meant to be. You get sick. You try natural ways to cure yourself, herbal medications etc. Still, you don't get well. What would you do? Would you let your condition deteriorate? Well, you can. But no. You go ahead and take medicines. If you go by the anti-God logic then we should let the diseases take their own course. You don't think like this for bypass surgeries, but when it comes to delivering a child, surgery is considered unnatural. Women are looked upon as weak. No, they are not. I choose C-section as I am living in a time where it is possible to plan the birth of my child. It is no less painful, no less risky. But it gives women another option, the scope to choose. It can be considered as a blessing of our time.

Time and circumstances, shape our opinions. My opinions for normal vs C-sec have chiseled. I no longer differentiate between them. Both are equally tough, tiring and liberating for a woman who is stepping in the shoes of a mother. We should respect both of them. And accept what is meant to be.

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After two pregnancies and deliveries, I am coming up with a series of posts to discuss some common and not so common issues, experiences a woman encounters during this happening phase of her life that no doubt, changes her perspective towards life and world. Click here to see all my articles related to Pregnancy and PostPartum