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Friday, August 15, 2014

Irony of life n death

I wrote this piece recently on a transit during a sad journey which made me reflect on the importance of everyone connected to us  in life. Do we realize and celebrate that importance during our each and every dealing with everyone. How many of us realize this while speaking to a person that he may or may not be alive tomorrow or I might not live to see a tomorrow?

Unlike life that announces its arrival 9 months before, death never tells its due date. It just knocks at our doorstep unannounced like a shameless guest. Yet, we behave as if life will go forever for each of us. What else then explains our egoistic fights with our near ones or friends or even strangers. We fight among ourselves for our materialistic desires, for our fake identity ignoring or to be precise forgetting, the probability of demise. Everyone feel that they are right and it is the other who should accept fault. The irony of life is we never stop looking at the shortcomings of a person when he /she is alive but when the person cease to exist we just want to remember his/her goodness.
What if, we could see the countdown of death. Maybe we would be more sensible with everyone in our day to day life. Think about it, a son is pissed off from his father's nagging and about to loose his temper when he see the countdown at his head to be 5 days and so he decides to face him in a calm state. Or a daughter-in-law is about to pick a fight with her mother-in-law who constantly irks her how to be a good wife when she see the counter telling 2 days, and she decides not to hurt the dying one.
 It sounds scary but it is still better than the scarier after thoughts that haunts the mind when you come to know about someone's untimely demise with whom you didn't reconcile after having a bad fight. You tell anyone or not but deep in your mind a thought is planted that why the hell you didn't make peace with that person when he or she was alive and around. For nobody wants to be in the bad books or unfulfilled wishes of a departing soul.
A very close, reverend, elderly member of my family is no more. I don't want to name the relationship I had with her as that doesn't matter since I have loved her as my real grandma. When she embraced me for the first time I felt very happy and it made up for all the times when my real grandma wasn't there to love me or play with me. Still, I didn't see her for last one year even when she would ask us to visit her along with my daughter. I was too busy building my materialistic life. Now I can't do anything about it. Had there been the counter or in short, had death been lesser evil and would announce its visit, I would have got her to stay with me and enjoyed her presence, her blessings, her scolding's. Its difficult to comprehend that she is no more. For she was so full of spirit that we assumed nothing can ever happen to her and we can meet her anytime as per our convenience. We no more have that luxury.
I know she is still around but that doesn't fill the void created forever in her place and the guilt I shall carry always in my heart. I know there are always unfulfilled regrets left behind when a person departs but that doesn't forgive the fact that we underestimated death and undermined the life. Thus, I have decided and also request you all to keep aside all the fights, egos and move forward and patch up with  broken friendship, relations, parents, siblings, children. Don't hurt anyone. You don't wanna change then don't. They don't wanna change then let them be happy for what they are.  But don't stop talking and seeing each other. For who knows may be that call of theirs which you let miss and didn't talk is their last for nothing can beat death in its unpredictability.